It can take a lot of time and effort to not do something. I’ve found at times that if I’m feeling overwhelmed and wanting more time off, wishing that there was less to do, that when I ask myself what I’m not doing, what I’m putting off. there can be something obvious to do. It can be such a relief to do whatever that was, and so energising.
Nike used this as a slogan some time ago - “Just do it!”
Fritz Perls had a somewhat direct way of expressing this - “Either shit or get off then pot”.
If worry is a problem for a client so they worry about worrying, we can invite them to just worry so they don’t have to worry about worrying and often the whole cycle wide down.
If someone is trying to avoid staying awake and so having trouble going to sleep, we can invite them to just stay wake.
If someone is trying to lose weight by avoiding certain food, they can unwittingly create an obsession which interferes with their success. We can encourage them to enjoy their food, and have the possibility of neutralising the conflict and allowing a peaceful resolution.
Next time you find yourself or next time a client has a problem where there is some avoidance, see what happens when you or your client plays with avoiding the avoidance and just does it!
So … avoidance is the problem … except when it isn’t!
More next time.
Rob
Rob,
Adding a bit to what you said, I have sometimes found it helpful to suggest worrying about whether you are worrying about the right thing. It quickly gets confusing.
Gary