My friend Ben Furman speaks about his innovative Kids Skills approach - practical, respectful ... and effective.
Rob
healing psychotherapy with Kids Skills - Ben Furman
Posted by Rob McNeilly admin on November 23, 2017 at 01:16pm
12 comments so far
How simple, Rob. We all want to change, improve or stop doing the maladaptive thing, but how useful to begin to contemplate or play with possible skills that would alter our view of the problem or simply allow it to transform or disappear. Thanks to Ben and to you!
Thanks Larry. I'm a fan of simple without trivialising. Ben also. He's a decent human being also, which helps.
What a great interview!
i really like the learning of skills rather than techniques. Techniques are great but unfortunately under stress techniques tend to crash whereas skills are innate and can match all situations. In this fast moving world we don’t have time to go through a set of steps which may not even match the issue. Great example of learning how to grow nails.
thanks for this Rob. It’s so good.
jack
Thanks jack. I like Ben, and respect his work, and I agree wholeheartedly about techniques. They are perfect for machines, but not for us organic creatures. Erickson said that all problems are learnt limitations ... so if problems can be learnt ...
Rob
I work with families of children on the spectrum and Asperger. Also what they call ADHD. After parents had been traumatised and the children with ABA a horrific violent therapy which I did with my son for a few sessions came to me to ask for something that was more compassionate. I found that a more relational approach to being with these children engaging them when they were in trance and amplifying the experience so that we could learn what they liked about that and then the changes were amazing and the behaviour became a way to communicate and self regulate rather than something that had to be forcefully changed. I taught this to the parents, the carers and the whole team and the we were all on the same page. I would produce a simple slide with photos that would show these moments and send them to them to everyone who was working with the child. Happy engaged and learning in a way that makes sense to them.
Be more of who you are! All of you is welcome ❤️So beautiful respectful and human
Thanks for sharing this interview. I will be telling all of our 8 kids (4 of whom are educators--plus one daughter-in-law) about Ben Furman and Kids' Skills. Lacking a skill is so much better than having a problem. And learning a new skill is so much more fun to focus on.
This is so exciting and respectful and inclusive and fun....really liked interview and thank you Rob for sharing. so cool that parents are not blamed too.
thank you for the book reference - i've ordered it